Hey guys. Been a while. Well…if you haven’t heard the news: Will Ferrell has set out to ruin one of my true joys in life.
Please…please, God, no. Please tell me this is some sick joke…no? The-they’re serious. *long drawn out sigh* Alright. Let’s talk about this.
I get that no one will ever be Jeremy Brett. Or match the work of art that is BBC Sherlock. I’m even willing to put up with Guy Ritchie’s farcical Sherlock Holmes and its sequel – hell, I’ll even watch Elementary when I’m bored! But this…this is the all time low.
First all, to quote the article, “After faring so well together in Talladega Nights and Step Brothers, Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly are reteaming in another Sony Pictures comedy.” ‘Faring so well’? I don’t know about Step Brothers, but I saw Talladega Nights and it’s exactly what you’d expect: a slapstick comedy about an idiot NASCAR driver, with all the humor and maturity of a Beavis and Butthead episode. It beats Anchorman in levels of stupidity – and that’s saying something! (I can’t believe Amy Adams submitted herself to that fuckery – but then, this is the woman who signed on for the DCCU.) Will Ferrell is only good when he’s not doing Will Ferrell movies: ergo, Elf and The LEGO Movie.
I can see it all now. It’s going to be a barrage of fucking shit and fart and boob and snot jokes. Probably weed too. And the gay jokes. Oh my God, you know they’re going to make gay jokes about Holmes and Watson. Because GOD FORBID anyone take the possibility of Sherlock Holmes being gay seriously without turning it into a big fucking joke (like Ritchie) or heterosexualizing it (like…Ritchie, again). And if I know Will Ferrell, he’ll probably get Sacha Baron fucking Cohen to play Moriarty, which will only make things worse. I know ACD said to do what you will with Holmes, but I’m sure he’s turning over in his grave at this new development.
Can’t we just have a third Ritchie movie?